Sleeping Like a Baby, and a Rant About a Roommate

I fell asleep last night while sucking B's....wait for it......thumb. Yeah, seriously, I fell asleep sucking his thumb.
I've decided that it's not weird at all, and is in fact the cutest thing ever. And since I've already decided you cannot tell me otherwise, so there.
If you haven't already picked up on it, we have a very unique dynamic, B and I. And I've never felt more like myself around anyone.

In other news, I HATE having a roommate.
He sent me a text this morning, which woke me up, by the way.
Should I have already been awake at 11:30 in the morning? Yeah, probably. Not the point.
He asked me if I was working today. I said no. So he asked me if I'd clean up the house.
Said he'd throw me ten bucks.
This wouldn't even be an outrageous request if B and I even had full use of the house.
But we just don't.
We NEVER use the living room, unless the roommate isn't home all day and B wants to watch a movie.
The roommate follows a pretty rigid routine, and gets very very annoyed if B or I somehow screw it up.
Say he comes home and wants to cook dinner, but I'm using the stove. He's pissed. Not my fault.
Or he gets home from the gym and wants to shower and B is already showering. He's pissed. Not B's fault.
I get that it's inconvenient, but that's part of having roommates, and B and I have more or less resigned ourselves to working around HIS schedule.
Because, well, he lived here first.
Even though we pay way more for the rent, because there's two of us, even though we only have one bedroom, just like him, and our room is way smaller.
We also have about 1/4 the cabinet and fridge space he does and---you know what, I could go on and on about our roommate.
From how he says creepy stuff to me when he comes home drunk and B isn't in the room to how his dog and two cats stink up the place and defecate where they shouldn't to how I'm pretty sure he is actually ripping us off every chance he gets on utilities, rent etc. (money we don't have, by the way.)
I'm sure sometime I'll get into deeper detail of what a scumbag this guy really is, but for now, point is:
We REALLY need to save up some dough and get our own place. Really.

Anyway, today, my need to please people beat out my desire to sit on my ass and do nothing and I agreed to clean HIS apartment. The little room B and I live in will have to suffer another day (I was PLANNING on cleaning that today since, you know, the mess in there is at least partially mine.) My personal hygiene will also have to suffer because I really need a shower, but also need to get this cleaning done before the roommate gets home. I'm 99.9% sure he won't be satisfied with the job I do and won't pay me, by the way.